reflection

Dear Husband,

Domestic violence is frequently a long term, repetitious pattern 

not a one time incident.

It wears many faces: 

abandonment, intimidation, threats,

cruelty, and neglect, 

simply not responding to a request for attention, 

or sexualizing a teenager's physical development...

even trivializing their developmental achievements 

or having unrealistic expectations causes trauma. 

Ignoring their pain and suffering, 

deliberately limiting their appropriate growth with rigid boundaries, 

or neglecting their health care needs.

With sorrow I watched you create your current relationships

with your daughter and son.

I enabled it, even as I tried to prevent it

and share my observations.

I hope you will find courage to open your heart 

and transform the current estrangement.

With affection,